When Positive Thinking Isn't Working

In my recent article, The Art of Consciously Creating, Part II, I introduced the law of attraction.  

If you have ever gotten fired up about the law of attraction and manifesting and had it fall flat, it isn't because this premise doesn't work - it's just that you didn't have all of the information about how to properly engage with it to get the results you desired.

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Imagine you haven't cleaned your cat's litter box ever and you just spray a little air freshener over it....That is exactly what it is like when you try to slap positive affirmations over fears and limiting beliefs that are deeply rooted in your subconscious mind.  It doesn't work.

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And there is absolutely no question as to which one is more powerful. Deeply held beliefs and fears will always win.  

It is not that the law of attraction does not work.  It is always working. The question is, how aware are you of what you are attracting?  

Synchronicity, the shadow self, and projection are all important concepts that intertwine with the law of attraction.

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Synchronicity

In Robert Ohotto's book, Transforming Fate into Destiny, he talks about synchronicity. This term was coined by Carl Jung, and as Ohotto says, "...stems from our psyche's interrelationship with the Universe and the laws of creation, not as a causal factor, but as a mirror".  

Then he recounts a story that Jung used to tell that his friend Richard Wilhelm was said to have actually experienced when he was stationed in a small provincial Chinese village that had been experiencing an extended drought.  The story goes like this.... After having exhausted all the prayers and rituals they could think of to bring rain, the elders of the village decided to recruit a famous rainmaker from a neighboring province.  Once he had arrived, the rainmaker requested a remote private hut where he could be completely undisturbed, and asked for enough food and water to last four days.  On the fourth day, the villagers awoke to a downpour.  Wilhelm immediately went to find the rainmaker and asked how he made it rain.  The old man said he had done nothing.  He proceeded to explain that in his own province, everything was in balance with the Tao (the Divine consciousness that connects us all) and that therefore, in his province, it rained when it needed to and then was sunny when that was called for, because all of those living in the region were in harmony with themselves.  He then pointed out that in this village, the people were out of balance with themselves, and that put them out of sync with the Tao. The rainmaker admitted, that upon his arrival, he himself had been thrown out of balance due to the chaotic consciousness of the villagers and therefore had isolated himself in order to reestablish the connection of harmony between himself and the Tao.  Once this resonance was restored, then it rained.

Synchronicity mirrors what is happening within us into the outside world.  If we are in alignment with our most authentic selves and our truest soul desires, then we experience synchronicity in the magical-seeming occurrences that coincide to move us along our path gracefully and with ease.  

​If we are out of balance with ourselves, and not living in authenticity, allowing our ego and shadow to dictate our lives, then synchronicity will externalize in our life as fate, creating events that prevent our continuation on our current path or even completely change our lives.  We know the symptoms of this type of synchronicity - illnesses, accidents, bankruptcy, and divorce are just some of the circumstances fate can devise to get our attention.

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The Shadow Self

The shadow self would then be what is stinking up the aforementioned litter box.  If you have not cleaned your litter box and like to pretend that your cat does not use it, then that air freshner is probably not working so well.  

At this point you can make the choice to decide that there must be something wrong with the air freshener, or all air fresheners (why can't I ever find an air freshner that actually works?), or realize that you actually need to deal with the shit in the box.

The shadow is part of life.  Just like the shit in the box, ignoring it isn't really going to get you to a place you want to be. Judging it won't help one bit.  You have to get in there and clean it up, regularly, and to do that, you first have to acknowledge that you actually have a cat and a litterbox and that this is all happening.

I really do love the Helen Keller quote, "Keep your face to the sun and you will never see the shadows.", but on the other hand, I don't want my dinner guests to be smelling those "shadows" I just shoved in the closet.

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So, we want to harness the law of attraction in our lives, and we've started down a few different paths and have been given some really unexpected road blocks.  We then find ourselves wondering if the road blocks are about learning to persevere, or if they are a sign that we are completely off course.  (Hint:  the fact that you actually wondered is your first clue.  It is kind of like if your answer is that you are unsure, you can go ahead and take it as a "no" because when it is a real YES, you don't even hesitate.)

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Projection

(Do you guys smell something?)

So the cat box hasn't gotten cleaned, and the air freshener isn't working, again, and it totally ruined your dinner party, and now you are really angry.

Projection is when you saddle others with the shadow that you have repressed rather than acknowledged.  One clue that you are projecting is it comes with a highly emotionally charged reaction.  

Another clue that you are indeed projecting your own shadow onto people and situations around you is that you find yourself in similar situations repeatedly, and are using terms like "always" and "never".  

(It was clearly not my cat using that box this whole time and creating this giant mess. I don't even think my cat eats that much.  Why does my house always smell awful?  Is it haunted? It must be haunted.  I think someone else's cat is getting in and using this litter box. And what is UP with all of the crappy air fresheners?  Will I ever find one that just does what it is supposed to do?!?)

The disownment of our shadows typically has to do with being socialized to judge certain traits as "good" and certain traits as "bad", rather than accepting them as all part of us and being taught to do regular psychic and emotional housekeeping, just like we would scoop out a litter box.

By labeling these parts of ourselves negatively and trying to separate from that part of ourselves, then we end up giving those negative traits extra power and they then slip out in subversive ways.  

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So now, understanding how powerful these shadow parts are, precisely because we attempt to ignore and disown them, we can see how the law of attraction, working on the premise of "like attracts like", would be working off of the stronger unconscious fears and limiting beliefs rather than any positive affirmations we are trying to apply.

Just like spraying air freshener around the overflowing cat box.

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Clean that litter box!

​We have to have the courage to look within and be accepting of what we find so that it doesn't keep seeping into our life in unconscious ways.  

Looking within can be much easier said than done.  Rather than trying to turn yourself inside out, look for clues in your life.  In what situations do you find yourself getting highly emotionalized?  What situations seem to keep occurring in your life that you find yourself complaining about, and what themes do they seem to have in common?  About what things in your life do you find yourself using the words "always" and "never"?  Do it in steps rather than trying to force it all at once.

Every single one of us has this shadow self - there is no need to criticize it or disown it. All we need to do is accpet it and understand it so that we remain in the driver's seat of our lives rather than it.  

Understanding when we are projecting is a huge clue to learning about our shadow self.  Acknowledging and allowing the shadow self is what allows us to reintegrate it and reclaim power of it, therefore bringing us back into balance and harmony with ourselves.  Being in harmony and alignment with our authentic self is  what allows synchronicity to manifest rather than fate intervening to redirect us.  And when we are in alignment and synchronicity is the byproduct of that, giving us the feedback that our internal world and external world are in harmony, then we are in a position to truly harness the power of the law of attraction to consciously create our lives.